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gulfan
 
The Cat, the Microwave and my horrific loss

Iíve never really posted a depressive `I need help with my pet hog` or `my girlfriend is a pathological liar from Mars` thread but I think itís time for my first everything depressive thread. First off, Iím not glorifying this event or trying to make people laugh. This is a real event that happened to me and in short, Iím asking for your sympathy regarding it and for you to insure that your Microwave is in good order. Itís all that I can think about at the moment and to me, itís a huge tragedy.

I live alone and I just recently moved into a bachelor pad in West Vancouver. Itís a really nice studio and I like it quite a bit. When people come over for the first time, their first impression is ďYou live HERE?Ē because itís very small but for me and my two cats Calvin and Hobbes itís perfect. Calvin has an obsession over sleeping on top of the Microwave, Why? I donít know. When I was unpacking my belongings from the move I found out that my microwave had been broken during the move and the glass on the front was cracked. Sure, this sounds like nothing and itís not what my thread is about, but itís related.

Iím a bit of a hermit, and thatís why I live alone. Iíve been used to Jeff Bezoís one click shopping with Amazon.com and I decided just purchase the microwave from Futureshop.ca which has a shipping center about ten blocks from my place. I got the ďPanasonic NN-S562BF 1.2 Cu Ft 1300 Watt MicrowaveĒ for a nice $185 with free shipping. I was pretty impressed considering I didnít move an inch.

I got the Microwave about two days later and the box looked a little beat up. Iím not too picky of a person so it didnít bother me. There was a sticker on it saying Returned 02/06/03 and there was a signature on the sticker and the word hinge lock. I didnít think much of it because I live a effortless life and I was more than excited to get my microwave.

Two weeks went by without incident and Calvin started sleeping on top of the microwave again. When I was cleaning the microwave I noticed there was a problem with the door with the hinge / lock.

Apparently microwaves have a mechanism so that they cannot run while the door is open, a simple safety measure obviously. What I didnít notice was that one day the small plastic hook that tells the microwave that the door is shut broke off and made the microwave think that the door was closed. This also caused the microwave door to be unstable in which, it would not stay perfectly shut since it didnít have the plastic piece thatíd hold the door to the body of the microwave.

Now weíre starting to get somewhereÖ This is the incident and Iím sorry that it took so much explaining just to get here. I feel that itís important for you to know that Iím not just some moron who microwaves other things intentionally.

At the time I was unaware about the Microwave door and what it was doing, so I decided to cook up four frozen burritos for dinner. It generally takes about six minutes to cook all of them. I left the burritos in the microwave cooking and everything seemed great. I went to my computer to load up my favorite internet forum and then listen for the microwaveís distinctive beep to know when it was time to chow down. When I heard the beep, I came back to find something even more horrific than four no name brand burritos in my microwave. Iím still not sure about the details but it seems that the door either swung open, or Calvin tried to jump upon the Microwave and the door flew open. She must have decided to sniff the food and stood on the turntable and tried to eat it or something. I couldnít tell if there was any bite marks on the food from the end result. I never heard the sound of the cat being micro waved and I never heard the cat meow or anything. To my utter disgust I saw Calvin laying there on top of the burritos with her eyes exploded and steam coming out of her. It was absolutely disgusting and horrific; I just broke down crying right there. Iím more than sure that Calvin died instantly because she was just lifeless. There was no twitching or movement or anything. I couldnít even hear her breathing the faintest bit.

I didnít want to touch her so I closed the microwave door, I put it in my Civic and I took it towards Stanley Park where I buried my previous cat. I dug a hole and buried the whole fucking lot, burritos and all.

I know your all going to laugh at me, and I feel like Iím a stupid guest on Jerry Springer complaining about the stupidest things but I really loved my cat. There was nothing I loved more than Calvin, and even though I still have her brother Hobbes; itís just not the same. This could happen to anyone; it could happen to your own pet or potentially hurt your own child.

If everyone could just check the safety mechanism on your microwave, your stove and even your drier Iíd be so much happier. This is a tragic loss to me, and because of it I want to at least let people know of the horrific unexpected. In closing, Iíd like to share this picture of Calvin from a year ago.


Old 03-18-2003, 06:36 PM gulfan is offline  
#1  

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M|22
 
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:37 PM M|22 is offline  
#2  

Qwijib0
 


for calvin
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:39 PM Qwijib0 is offline  
#3  

SoSmooth
 
shit dude, i'm really sorry.
Old 03-18-2003, 06:39 PM SoSmooth is offline  
#4  

AgentCheese
God, that felt good.
 
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my condolences for your burritos
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:39 PM AgentCheese is offline  
#5  

gayblade
 
dude i'm really sorry for your loss. there's nothing funny or stupid at all about losing a pet, it's a really sad thing
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:41 PM gayblade is offline  
#6  

Briggsy
 
I'm really sorry about your cat.

but ... FUCKING SUE! You were shipped a damaged, returned item as new, and the fault WAS DEADLY. You could probably get several 10's of k's in damages / keep quiet money without much hassle.
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:41 PM Briggsy is offline  
#7  

M|22
 
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I'm going to forward this to amazon.com, hope you don't mind.
Old 03-18-2003, 06:43 PM M|22 is offline  
#8  

~FuZzY bUnNy~
 
That sux royally...theres just some stuff that seems like it could never happen to you but when it does DAMN. *hugs*
~YP~
Old 03-18-2003, 06:43 PM ~FuZzY bUnNy~ is offline  
#9  

SonicTron
I shit my brains out for DAYS and all I got was this title
 
dude I don't like cats, but I'm really sorry about that. Sue the microwave company........
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:43 PM SonicTron is offline  
#10  

zippycut
 
I'm so sorry man.
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:43 PM zippycut is offline  
#11  

Squid
 
my god that is horrible.

i'm sorry you lost your in such a terrible way. have you called a lawyer yet?
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:43 PM Squid is offline  
#12  

Dino688
 
Dam, that really has to suck. Ive never owned a pet but i have friends who would do anything for their animals.
Old 03-18-2003, 06:44 PM Dino688 is offline  
#13  

action
 
Gimmic.
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:44 PM action is offline  
#14  

JuJuBeee
Too stupid to know better and too immature to care
 
smells like
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Old 03-18-2003, 06:44 PM JuJuBeee is offline  
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